Because Lady A was gradually moving in to the Lord’s place, we did the work over a few weekends. We started out getting Lord A’s space in shape, and once Lady A moved in, we tackled her stuff, and the rest of the apartment. Because of how much work their space needed, after the consult, I sent them a detailed recap document, detailing organizational options we discussed for the space, and providing suggestions of what to get and where to get it. I wanted to be sure that when I showed up to do the work, we could hit the ground running.
For a studio apartment, the A Team has a lot of space. Some of it is a little unique, though, and an organizational challenge. For example, their main closet does not go to the ceiling, and has about three feet of storage space above it. They had things stored up there, but they were unsightly. We had to come up with a solution to make that space both usable and not an eyesore. The main closet also has some built-ins, which Lord A was persuaded by his contractor to install. They’re definitely not in the most functional place, and the contractor didn’t do a great job hanging the clothing rods at the correct height, so we had to figure out how to work with that. They also have a large utility/coat closet that looked like something out of Hoarders. It needed some work.
What I found interesting about working with the A Team was that they each had their own hang ups, and they were not the same. So, even though they were a team, the solutions I had to devise were specific to each individual in order to get them to the closet they wanted. (I do not know why this is surprising; all people are different, and the Lord and Lady are not the same person. I’m not a shrink, ok, bitches?) Let’s take a look at what was causing them strife.
The Lord’s Closet Hang-Ups
Let It Go. The Lord fancies himself a thrifty and pragmatic fellow; I would agree with most of that. However, his pragmatism loses me when he insists on keeping an empty cardboard box for a model of some Star Wars ship, and when his closet has pieces of clothing that is worn, faded, and starting to get holes. Honey, no. Let it go.
The Lady’s Closet Hang-Ups
You May Be Right. Surprisingly to me, The Lady was not good at following instructions! Despite the detailed recap document I sent the A Team, The Lady pulled a Palin and went rogue. I showed up to do the work and was surprised, and had to do some negotiating with the Lady about her off-book choices. Eventually, though, she decided that The Bitch may be right.
My Way. The Lady had some very particular feelings about doing things, even though her consult responses suggested otherwise. We had to spend some time figuring out why she wanted it the way she did, particularly when they seemed impractical, and discuss why other options might be better.
Teaching the A Team the Process
The Lord
On the Lord’s day [Bitchy note: Oooh, a biblical pun!], we spent a lot of time getting him to let things go. His rationale for keeping things? “Just because it has a hole doesn’t mean I can’t still wear it. You can barely see it. It’s still a shirt.” My method? Showing him how much other stuff was in his closet, going largely unworn. My other method? Something I learned from Stacy London on What Not To Wear: cost per wear. (Some people call this “girl math.” I find that offensive.) Figuring out what an item is purchased for and dividing it by the number of times its worn determines its cost per wear. Once he figured out he’d worn something like a $50 shirt over 100 times, and that it was almost a negative cost per wear, he was more comfortable getting rid of things. In terms of the actual organizing, the Lord was easy, and even decided he wanted to ditch his wooden hangers to get velvet ones to save space. Be still my velvet hanger loving heart!
We started tackling the A Team's coat/utility/zombie apocalypse closet on the Lord's day, too. As you can see on the left, we made a minor adjustment to the way the A Team used the space, with a plan that I'd come back and we'd do a more fulsome overhaul of the utility closet on the Lady's day. We shifted the wire shelf from the middle of the closet to the far right, and in doing so we made the shelf more accessible, and made the space in the entire closet more functional. We moved the jackets to the left side of the closet, and with the free floor space, put two heavy plastic containers on the floor, instead of up high on a cumbersome shelf. It's still messy here, but I assure you, the full after photos are a sight to behold.
The Lady
Because the Lady decided to go rogue, her day was a little different, and in addition to the usual editing and organizing, we took a shopping trip together. We went to a few stores that have organizational goodies (Target, BBB, and TJ Maxx), and I walked the A Team through a variety of options, and gave them my opinions on what would work best in their space. Even though I’d sent them a detailed-post consult list saying essentially the same stuff, we realized they needed me with them while shopping to crack the whip. I was ok with that. Once all appropriate accessories were purchased, we went back to their place and got down to business.
On the Lady’s day, we had less stuff to go through, as she’d done a pre-move purge herself. For us, it was more about figuring out how to put things away. As she aptly noted in her consult, she is rough on her stuff, and not great about folding, or hanging, or putting stuff away generally. However, she realized that this was not a method that would work now that she was sharing space with the Lord. We talked about what she should hang and what she should fold in order to make best use of their space. We also had to negotiate a shoe rack versus clear shoe boxes. The shoe rack is where Lady A went rogue. She was so proud of it, and thought she had found herself a great organizational solution. [Bitchy note: I felt bad that she was so proud and I was raining on her parade. But I couldn’t help myself. That’s my job!] After a lot of discussion, I persuaded her to just try putting her shoes in boxes and putting them on the shelves, on the theory that if she didn’t like it, we would take them out of the boxes and put them back on the rack, and no one would get hurt. She acceded to my request, and dare I say, she came out on the other side. Lady A was adamant that she wasn’t going to fold things or put them away properly, but after showing her what I affectionately call my “little soldiers” method, I think she was converted.
After the clothing, we moved on to the coat/utility/zombie apocalypse closet. Their biggest problem in this area? They didn’t know what was in there. I mean, they knew some things were in there, but they weren’t sure where, and they weren’t sure what else was there. We had a lot to purge, and a lot to figure out in terms of organizing. My method? Small, clear, stackable boxes. We purged things that needed purging, and then spent time categorizing their items and putting like things together. Now, when they need batteries, they go to their battery box. When they need light bulbs, they go to their bulb box. When they need duct tape, they go to the duct tape box. You get the picture.
It was a small space and a lot of stuff, and it was definitely a challenge. However, after putting in the hard work, I think the A Team is going to be able to keep it up.